This has been a very different week for me, but what a blessing it has been to go through it all. First off, The computer has been down for a while, which i really didn't care {more time in reading}. Sunday night, my sister and my friend Ruthanna came here for a few days. I was able to see them in the morning when i got up for a few hours before work. I felt really bad that i had to go to work, but it was alright. Wednesday night, There was a small party going on in the basement {well, a party is with my two brothers, Joy, Ruthanna, and I}, and we were all just talking about this or that. It was really great to catch up, and to let things out. Well, about 3:30 am, Ruthanna and i ended up going to the kitchen and talked til 5am as everyone else went to bed. It was a real Blessing for me to just talk to Ruthanna. Thursday went by really fast, almost as if it never happened. The Lord has been working in my heart the whole week. It has been hard at times, but i am learning to just let God take control, and when He does, things are better. I was able to let Joy cut my hair while she was here, and Joy was able to go to grandmas for a few hours and I went with her. Joy let me drove Ruthanna's car, and it was a beauty. At first it was strange being so low to the ground, but it was sweet as soon as i got to a busy-street. i didn't mess up, and i didn't have someone yelling at me to do this or that...it was great.

Friday at work was the longest day i've ever worked...14 hours. It was great, because I was working and studying, and the guys were playing around with each other. {Now i know who i can play around with, and let them play around with me too... I miss being around Jolene, because she was always willing to pick on me back.} Anyways, After a few guys left, i was able to work where they were at {whenever I had no parts}. Harry, one of the guys who drive the Hilow around, thought it was rally strange to see me working at another station. O-wells, I needed to stay up, and the best way to do that is to keep moving. He told me that i must love working because i just can't stop, I just laughed at him.

Saturday, After work.. I thought it was really strange seeing the lights on, and people coming in. Usually the lights are going off, and no-one else is around but those who was working. But it was good. I was able to see this guy, Bill, look good. Because by the time i get to work, He is usually a mess from sweat and what-nots. i was able to sleep for 6 hours, and i thought it would be best just to stay up so i can be able to go to church Sunday. So the whole day i read a book, then read the Bible, then sat outside and enjoyed the weather. It was a nice peaceful day. I didn't have to worry about going to work, or going anywhere. I was just able to watch the sunset, and just relax. I was able to go to bed at 12 and fall asleep without having to just lay there waiting to fall asleep til 5 am.

Sunday, the bus came late. i didn't care just as long as it came is all that matters. Church was great. I saw sandy {who has been wondering where i've been.} The sermons were great too. I must have yawned about a million times, but i was awake and i was paying attention. Pastor Marriott was in a great mood today, he was letting some jokes come out right..then left...etc. But over all, His sermon was a real hitter. Someone raised their hand to come to know the Lord, What a blessing it is to know that someone is starting to understand God's Word and want to come to know Him. Pastor Bryan had said a few things about those who have talents and double it and the one who buried his. I got thinking about what is a talent?. I've always wondered about this whenever i hear the story. Then it hit me really hard, it's who you helped lead to the Lord. It's not how much money ya have, or how smart you are, but It's how many people you told about the Lord. I also got thinking about the treasures in heaven, it is not a sin to want it because it is our reward from Christ. To tell you the truth, I would love to have treasures from Christ, but at the same time, i know that i don't deserve any of it at all. I deserve to get all hay and wood. But what a blessing it is to know that I am getting something from the Lord. I want to please Christ and not man. What can the world give me? pleasure. But God gives me peace, and Love, and Joy. He gives me much more than the world can offer me. What a blessing that is. I am God's daughter, and He loves me so much.

I wonder why people take things for granted for. We all miss out on things that the Lord has put in front of our faces. I know I take for granted each breathe, and each step. Sometimes I feel like, with me being home, I am beinn taken for granted. The kids seem to think that mom and dad are paying for everything, and they can get extra things from me because i have money now {well, whats left of it anyways}. The kids know I love to clean and love things to be clean- so they don't do anything but the dishes. It's funnie how we can all do that, take someone for granted. We think they will stay here on earth forever, but in the end find out that they are not on earth anymore.

My uncle is pretty old now, i am not sure how old he is, but he is my dad's uncle {my Great Uncle}. I love him loads and he is a great guy. But i always thought he could live forever, but i know that he isn't. I just wish i could've spent more time with him, but he never really wanted to spend time with me {just the boys}. Now, he is getting older and i am older than i was when i last saw him. I have changed so much, and all he thinks about me is as that little girl i once was. I am missing my little chats with my Aunt {Great Aunt, and she really is great too..}. I really wanted her to teach me how to sew things, but she told me that i had to know how to before she can {which didn't make any sence at all to me.} . O-wells. I guess it just wasn't meant to be. My Uncle told my dad that my dad nor us was in his will, and to tell you the truth.. I don't care.. I just want to spend time with him before he leaves earth to be with Jesus.

The Lord made each living thing, from the trees to man to the stars to the sand. Yet, we all take for granted that this could be our last year, last day, last hour, last minute, last breathe. Are you ready to see God? I know I am, but it is not God's will that i go just yet. Maybe there is someone's heart I can touch, and He wants to see if i'll touch his/her heart. Or maybe, someone needs to touch my heart. I know the Lord already touched it, maybe someone else too?? I dunnos.

Today when I was at work, I thought about who could that guy be!!??!! someone i know now, or will know? Maybe I messed things up btw the "one" and I when I went for Jasper. I don't know, but God knows. I started thinking about how I want "him" to be like.. i know what I want, but the looks? To tell you the truth, it doesn't matter. He can be fat or skinny, tall or short {but i like tall}, blond or not, blue or brown or hazel eyes {i like blue eyes}, Cute or "ungly" {doesn't matter, because to me he'll be handsome}..etc.. It realyl doesn't matter how he looks, just as long as he loves the Lord, and will be willing to love me for me. I can easily put someone else's pic on my profile and get guys to "like" me..{sadly enough, guys who could be my dad}, but it's not the best way to go i guess. Because I am me, and if any guy doesn't wanna be my friend then it is his problem, because looks is only looks. I believe that I am a very sweet, kind, tenderhearted, loving, adorablely cute Lady. I am willing to give up all that I have to be with the right one, to help him with whatver he is doing. This is something they don't see, because many guys go for girls who have the "looks". But there are many girls who has the "look" and is very Godly {like a few girls i know from college, Ali, Emily,,etc..} , but it is sad when someone who has the "look" but doesn't have the heart, yet guys go for them before they even think about going for someone who has the heart but not the "look". Yeah, it is our nature to want something beautiful and to keep it, but looks will be gone,,, because we are all going to be getting new bodies. I am the type of a girl who looks at people's heart before their looks.. maybe that is why Jolene and I are such great friends.. Her heart is more beautiful than her "looks", yet, to me to be very Beautiful.. I can't see why any guy wouldn't want to be with her... {okies, maybe some of the guys who are going for her should leave her be...}

I really am starting to think the Lord is calling me to be single. I don't want to be, but it just may be that way. And if it is, then I am ready for it. I am willing to learn things, and to pay my own bills. I was also thinking about that, what would it be like if i just moved away!?! I know my place will be clean, but will i be able to make enough for rent, for food, and for college? what about a car, and then gas?. i don't think so. But i am ready to leave this pig-pin. But there isn't a way out. O-wells. The Lord will open a way someday, just not now!!

Who Ever thought that this little baby will be all grown up, at 4'9 3/4, this little girl has a meaning. What, only God knows. What a Blessing that is. I can't believe how much I've changed from this skinny baby to a fat baby, to a skinny kid, to being TinyToes. I am too blessed to be alive right now. I hear stories of where babies, or kids die from this or that {cancer, or car-crash}. I am able to walk, talk, hear, see, breathe, and smell.

The other day, I was watching The Messengers. It's a show where there is a group of people who give speeches on a word {like Charity}. Each week they do something new. First week they were homeless for 24 hrs. Second week they were on a farm -picking veggies. Third week, 4 people were in wheelchairs as the other 4 were blind. This one really touched me. Those who were in the wheel chair said that people just kept looking at them, and it was hard to get help from strangers. How many times do you see someone in a wheelchair and just stair at them? When i see someone in a wheelchair, i often wonder how can i be friends with them!!?!!. When I found out that my tutor was in a wheelchair I was so pleased. Everyone needs a friend, and I love being friends with those who have a hard time getting friends. I had such a blast with my tutor. Just getting to know her, and knowing how much she praises the Lord for many things. I never asked what happened, for I knew she would tell me if she really wanted to, and if not, then it just doesn't matter. What matters is her heart, and it surely was beautiful {like she is}. Anywhos, The other 4 were blind. If i was on that show, I would pick being blind to. I often wonder what it would be like to be blind {not that i want to}. But i knew it would just be very hard, because I love seeing things {like the sunset}. As I was watching them getting onto a train, {missing 2 people near the end-and how they found them.} it hit me really hard. I am able to see things. God can easily take that from me any second now. My grandma is going blind, and my grandpa is going death. I think it would be hard for me to not be able to see things, or to hear. I love listening to music, when i work or when i am doing something, and to go the rest of my life without being able to hear.. it's just hard to understand. But I can praise the Lord for letting me able to walk, to see, to hear, to touch. I can talk to people, and I can smell {flowers... too bad I have to smell skunks at times---YUCK!!}.

Wowsie, a week gone by, and I am learning so much. I am learning to have patience with my Lord, and to have Faith in Him. He is working in me, and it is taking me a long time to let Him work in me. But now I am really starting to see that I really need Him. I can't depend on myself for things. I can't say, "I can do that on my own." because I can't do it on my own. I can't make enough money for school on my own, I need God's help. Maybe He wants to me use the money I am earning to help my family out for a whille before I can go back to school. The Lord knows that I am missing school alot. Maybe I can learn better if I have to wait a few years. But what is learning without fun? I think I will have a hard time if I can't go back while Jolene is still there, but I know that the Lord will help me through.

Sorry, Lately I've been in a mood to talk. None of my friends are on much when I am on {at 1 am or 3 am}. So, I've been just letting my talking mood go to my blog {maybe that is why it is updated more than most people.. and why noone reads it---because it's too long} O-wells. At least I am getting things out, even if Noone is reading it, or is updating theirs. For those who think I am just a quiet little girl, you have things to learn about me. I love to talk, just it is hard for me to just talk to someone I barley know. I can't just go up to someone and start talking, unless I am very hyper or I have a close friend with me at the time. Other-wise, I'll just listen. One can learn a whole lot just by listening. I may not be smart in books and grade-wise, but I am very smart in other ways. Strange to think that I am smart ah? O-wells.

Who ever thought that this could happen to them? A branch falling on ya house and doing some damages to two houses?

I was at work when it fell. My sister had called my dad, and my dad was running around the place like a chicken's head cut off. Next thing i knew, we were flying cars by on the road and we were home. {It was night out, but this is a pic from this morning.} As you can see, it isn't a small branch that fell. The nieghbour's porch is smashed.

Noone was hurt, well..the houses were. A few broken windows, a few holes in the roof, and a branch in my room. But Praise be to God. He is the One we should be Praising throughout this. I mean, we could be paying for all the damages, but the Lord is watching out for us and keeping us save. Well, Kaytie did say she didn't like the way i decorated the room with my things. Guess she can enjoy this a bit more {seeing how it is only about 1 foot away from the top bunk}.

I guess as I went off to work, someone came and moved that branch off of our houses. It is just so funnie how one day you think things are going to be like any other day, but it turns out that it is just a crazzie day. Today when I was at work, I think only about 2 people didn't ask me where my dad was, and what went on, or why did we left work so early. Other than that, it was alright. I was able to do 548s {dad said if I really wanted to get on there then I should ask for it, but I knew that I'll be on it, because I've been on it for the past 3 weeks now.} so I was able to stay awake.

I've been studing out James lately. Well, today I was reviewing some of the verses, letting them go through my head and out my mouth. Then verse 3 in chapter one hit me really hard. "Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience." I then realized that I need to have faith in God. I need to just wait, and let God do His work. For verse 4 says "But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing."

I am usually wanting things to be done and over with, but with what a friend told me, I am looking forward to seeing what God is going to do next. A friend {Stephen} pretty much told me that it was fun to go through the hard times rather than getting to the finish. I really am excited for once to go through all this mess. Because if it was over right now, I wouldn't appreachiate it much as I would if i went through it all. Just like with who I am, I need to grow in Him, and just let Him work- rather than wishing I was this or that. What great friends I have. And here I am helping a friend of mine with what i just learned. What a Great God I have. Even though I grew up in a non-Christian home, went to a Public school, and had no friends at church, God blessed me greatly with the friends i do have now. I mean, I could've given up going to church, and end up hanging out with my "friends" who are into drugs--etc--. I could've been half-dead by now from a "bf" who just beated me up for some money{$20}. But I am not, I am here. I am alive, and have people who care for me. What a Great God!!! Why would He love me for? I am just a sinner. But He gave His only Son for my sake, and I am free of sin now.

I was hit by a huge brick by God on Sunday. Not just one time, but three times. First one was during Sunday School with Pastor Bryan. He talked on the wedding, and how out judgment isn't about our sins, but about how our hearts react toward things...like how was my attitude toward someone who did me wrong! That hit me hard, because I've been falling so much- and haven't even tried to get back up much. I wonder how much treasures I have in heaven.. I am very sure that is really isn't much at all. Second brick was when Pastor Marriott preaches in Acts. He said a few things that got my thinking. I re-wrote them in the back of my Bible- oso i can remember later on. "If we're going to give the message out, then we must know it ourself as well," and, "When going through a trial, don't shut your Bible, but open it." I need to get into the Word more, and want to give it out to others. I shouldn't worry about how others think about me, because I am God's daughter, and I need to start showing it. Third brick was when Pastor Marriott's son, David, preached in Matthew. He mainly preached about a begger. He also said a few things that got me thinking. "We miss, don't see our own spiritual need...we need to go to God", "I am a begger, I cannot save myself". Am I really begging God to help me with my spirital needs, or am I wanting to do it my own way and on my own? Have I been falling further way from my Father; The only Father, Friend, Savior who have loved me so much? I am still here on earth. There has to be a speical reason for it- and one day I'll find out. But for now, I need to wait and be prepare for when He comes to get His children.

I was just sitting at my desk, and was just thinking about many different things. I looked up at my wall, and saw my sign which says, "What you are is God's gift to you, What you make of yourself is your gift to God." Now, the only question I have to ponder for a while is, Who am I? I know, I am Dayna- God's child, but who am I really? I know what I want in life- To help others, and to be there for someone. I want to be the wife a man would want to come home to, a wife that will support him with whatever he is doing, {preaching, factory, cleaning, cooking,, etc.}. But I really do not know who I am deep down at times. Who is that girl behind those eyes? This is something that will end up coming out someday. But for now, it is just me. I am a shy girl who is learning to be more out-going with the friends she picked {Jolene}, and a girl who is very creative in many things. I may be slow at learning things from books, yet, I am very smart {other ways than books and gradewise} for my age. 0-Wells. Life is life, I guess. You only get life once, what you do with it is up to you. I much rather spend my life following the One who freed me, than to live a life not knowing Him. I often wonder what it would be like to be in a different family. But then I got thinking, what if a different family meant not knowing Jesus?...Would it be worth it? I think not. I love my family, just at times... I don't really see why I am in this family. For now, I'll just let Christ lead the way. He'll let me know the answers later on in life.

Sometimes I wish I can go back and re-live my life and change some things around.. like my relationship with God, who my friends were, and a few other things. The only thing I wouldn't change is the fact that I didn't kill myself. I am very glad to be alive right now. Ps 139 says it all, and Verse 14 is what helped me want to keep my life. Oh, Praise the Lord for a wonderful sister, a wonderful teacher, and a wonderful Pastor's Wife {Mrs. Anderson}. I look up to her so much throughout High-school. It was like she was my only friend. I am sure she would've given me that hug I needed back then if she knew how I felt. But that is the past, and nothing can change it now. God was through it all back then, and He is still in my life today. What a Blessing that is.... to be able to know God personally, and not wonder if He can hear me.

Ever wonder what it would be like to drive on the other-side of the road? I often wonder this. I think it would be very strange just to get into the passenger side and find that you will be the one driving. But at the same time, I think it will be very exciting, because it is something new. A friend of mine told me that if I really wanted to drive on the other side of the road, I should live in that country for a few years before trying to drive. I do often wonder if people over seas wonder what it would be like to be on the other side of the road too! Which way is the right way? Which way is best for you? You see, driving can be fun and exciting, yet scarey at the same time. But once you are able to drive on the other side, things are different.

Have you every felt like you were on your own? I feel like this many time, but deep down I know for a fact that I am not alone at all. I am 100% on my own paying for school, and I am on my own to make good friends. But the tuffest thing I've been on my own for, is being the only Christian at a work-place. I am finding it hard to interact with the guys. {I am one of two girls there, but the other girl likes to be on her own and doesn't want to sit outside in the cool air.} The guys love talking about what they did over the weekend, or make fun over each other. I can handle the smoke {I grew up in a house where my parents smoke}, but I can't stand all the swearig that goes on. I am the only one who doesn't listen to rap or rock-n-roll {I have my own Rock to listen to, and that is God's music}, and I am the only one who doesn't smoke, drink or swear. Now I don't mind if they all think I am crazzie, for it is a great way to show them the love of my Father, but I can't stand it when they don't want to listen to what I have to say. I guess you can't win them all.

It hurts to hear when people you know, or those who you kinda know, ends up died. A car-crash, or some other reasonings. But each time, I go to God and pray that He could use me in a way to help others. I sometimes wonder what it'll be like to get hurt or die for someone. I'll be willing to die in a car-crash if it means someone coming to know the Lord, but it is kinda scarey just knowing that you wouldn't know what'll happen for sure. Noone could come to know the Lord, but maybe it can help someone open their eyes or something. I know for a fact that I am going to Heaven, but deep down I know that I shouldn't be able to at all. I am such a sinner, and I don't deserve to even be here on earth. I am loved very much by my Father, and what stinks a lot is that I don't show Him the same amount of love back. I fall, and I trip over steps, but He is always there to help me get back up. What a blessing to know that a Wise man falleth 7 times and each time he gets back up, and God never stoped loving him. He does that with me too, even though I had fallen a million times already.

Ever thought of growing up? Each year seems like you havn't grown at all, but others have noticed. Today is my twin brother's birthday, they are 17 now. I can't believe how grown up they are getting. They still have alot to go, but it is all in God's timing. Last night, Greg {the oldest of the twins} came into my room and we ended up talking for a few hours. What a blessing it was to get to talk to him. He isn't a little boy anymore, although, I can still call him my little brother {No matter how much taller he gets from me} . I tooked the boys to a store and had them pick something out for their gift. They both wanted a Cd and a Cd-player, so payed for the cds and one of the cd-player {dad payed for the other cd-player}. What a blessing it was to be able to do that for them.

I also grabed a few wedding scrapbooking things for my sister's scrapbook. So I added them into the book, and it looks great. Then I realized that I forgot to add a page for Chris's parents. I was going to do that before they get here, but it is kinda sad that I forgot to do that page. O-wells. I'll do it this week.

Joy is coming next weekend. I can't wait. I miss her loads, and I also miss my friend Ruthanna loads. Jolene is going to be so happy when Ruthanna drops off her pillow and blanket {which we took from Jo when we droped her off at the airport--suitcase was too heavy.}. Why is she going to be so happy you ask, Well!!! let me tell you........................... itsn't that going to be awesome? And she wouldn't know it was coming. It'll hit her left and right {ok, not really}. But she is getting a little something from me, well... at least a card {or three}. It is kinda sad that I am not going to be there for her 20th birthday. No birthday hug for her this yr. O-wells. She'll have to deal with it. But over all, she'll like the card {or three}.

Father's Love!!


"Let me tell you a serect, about a father's love.
A Scercet that my father said was just between us.
You see dads don't just love there children every now and again.
It's a love without end, amen."

I heard this song as I was working today. Boy did it got me thinking. My Father doesn't just love me every now and then, but He loves me without end. He never stops loving me. Its amazing how a song can get you thinking about Christ. If it wasn't for Him, then I wouldn't be here. It is a huge blessing to be His daughter.

"Goodness, if my mind were on display, you would gag in horror. Yet, God sees the trivial and disobedient thoughts, and loves me despite the disappointment they cause. My holy God cannot even look at the sin in my heart."

Rebecca {a friend of mine}, wrote this in one of her blog. This is so true. Our minds can be so filled with the worldly things and not on Godly things. Like she said, "loves me depite the disapoointment they cause." He loves us even when we are sinners, even when we disappoint Him with what we do, and think.

Ever miss something so much that you just want to cry? I miss school so much, and I know it'll be very hard for me when it comes time for all my friends to go back to school.

Here is a list of things that I miss about school...

Hanging out with Jolene

Working in the kitchen, and working at night with the custodial

Having room-mates

Hanging with my friends in the Student Center or in the Dinning Hall

Babysitting 4 wonderful and trouble makers

Going to a Huge church in town and working with the kids {the toddlers too}

Having Chapel everyday and being able to take that hour away from classes

Having a wonderful Dorm-Sup who was willing to listen to me {even if it wasn't important}

The guys opening the door for the girls, and being Gentlemen

Southern Oaks- Talking to teen girls about different things

But of course, some may miss something but there are always things that they don't miss.. so here is a list of things that I do not miss at all..

Having to get up very early each day

Getting about 4-5 hrs of sleep

Having to share a bathroom with many girls {who takes over the sinks in the morning}

Homework

Classes

A few people {Jolene knows who I am talking about}

Spending money on Books

Worring if I'll have enough money for the next semester

• No matter what, It's just a blessing to know people my age. So what if people from my home-church don't like me, I have great friends at school. I never really knew what it was like to have a Godly Friend until I went to school. I met Ruthanna, and Jolene. I see myself growing more in Christ. When I am around them, I feel very blessed. We may be a little different, but we have the same Father.

Who is that girl behind those clothes? Noone knows until they get to know her. One person can tell a whole lot about someone from their eyes. It's like looking deep into their souls. You can tell if someone is down and hurting, or if someone is truely happy. Someone can look like they are happy just by smiling a whole lot, but deep down be hurting.

It's amazing how people act around others. The guys go for girls who are "beautiful", and the girls go for those who are "cute". Even Christians do this. They look at what someone looks like rather than look at who they are. Maybe that is why people can't get along at times. Maybe that is why I grew up hating myself, but loving others more.

The thing that I really want, is something that I could never get, and no one could ever give it to me but God. I know that He wouldn't give it to me, because this is who I am, and I should become a better person without it. What is it, you ask? It is my size, I want to be taller. If I was taller, then my fatness wouldn't be fatness anymore, and I would be "beautiful". But where would I be if noone would tell me, "WOW!, you look young for your age!", "You will appreachiate it when you are older!" ??? But, I am sure noone understands how sick I am of hearing that. I love the looks on people when they find out that I am 20 and not 12, but the words I could do without. Mom and Dad loves to tell people how old I am for that fact, but I really could care less now. O-wells!! Thats life I guess. But I can so see why Aaron, or any other guy, wouldn't wanna be with someone like me.


Yesterday, I got up early to go help Pastor Dave with some VBS things. He had Kaytie and I made loads of copies of the verse-booklets, and put it together. We had pizza afterwards and was able to talk. I thought that was awesome, because it really has been a long while since I was able to talk to Pastor Dave. As soon as we walked outside, I felt like I was on fire. It was 115 degrees outside, which meant it would be close to 130+ degrees at work. It was mega hot working. The funnie thing is that I was told that I was working too fast, but I was working mega slow. O-wells. I nutted up a part {weld on two nuts}, and I did 747 of them. . Well, back to work i go today, and it is suppose to get just as hot, if not hotter. YEAHH ME!!

But priase the Lord we are able to appreachiate what Moses did when they had to walk in the Dessert. I am sure it was just as hot for them as they walked, or as they complained about not having water when they want it.