I wonder why people take things for granted for. We all miss out on things that the Lord has put in front of our faces. I know I take for granted each breathe, and each step. Sometimes I feel like, with me being home, I am beinn taken for granted. The kids seem to think that mom and dad are paying for everything, and they can get extra things from me because i have money now {well, whats left of it anyways}. The kids know I love to clean and love things to be clean- so they don't do anything but the dishes. It's funnie how we can all do that, take someone for granted. We think they will stay here on earth forever, but in the end find out that they are not on earth anymore.

My uncle is pretty old now, i am not sure how old he is, but he is my dad's uncle {my Great Uncle}. I love him loads and he is a great guy. But i always thought he could live forever, but i know that he isn't. I just wish i could've spent more time with him, but he never really wanted to spend time with me {just the boys}. Now, he is getting older and i am older than i was when i last saw him. I have changed so much, and all he thinks about me is as that little girl i once was. I am missing my little chats with my Aunt {Great Aunt, and she really is great too..}. I really wanted her to teach me how to sew things, but she told me that i had to know how to before she can {which didn't make any sence at all to me.} . O-wells. I guess it just wasn't meant to be. My Uncle told my dad that my dad nor us was in his will, and to tell you the truth.. I don't care.. I just want to spend time with him before he leaves earth to be with Jesus.

The Lord made each living thing, from the trees to man to the stars to the sand. Yet, we all take for granted that this could be our last year, last day, last hour, last minute, last breathe. Are you ready to see God? I know I am, but it is not God's will that i go just yet. Maybe there is someone's heart I can touch, and He wants to see if i'll touch his/her heart. Or maybe, someone needs to touch my heart. I know the Lord already touched it, maybe someone else too?? I dunnos.

Today when I was at work, I thought about who could that guy be!!??!! someone i know now, or will know? Maybe I messed things up btw the "one" and I when I went for Jasper. I don't know, but God knows. I started thinking about how I want "him" to be like.. i know what I want, but the looks? To tell you the truth, it doesn't matter. He can be fat or skinny, tall or short {but i like tall}, blond or not, blue or brown or hazel eyes {i like blue eyes}, Cute or "ungly" {doesn't matter, because to me he'll be handsome}..etc.. It realyl doesn't matter how he looks, just as long as he loves the Lord, and will be willing to love me for me. I can easily put someone else's pic on my profile and get guys to "like" me..{sadly enough, guys who could be my dad}, but it's not the best way to go i guess. Because I am me, and if any guy doesn't wanna be my friend then it is his problem, because looks is only looks. I believe that I am a very sweet, kind, tenderhearted, loving, adorablely cute Lady. I am willing to give up all that I have to be with the right one, to help him with whatver he is doing. This is something they don't see, because many guys go for girls who have the "looks". But there are many girls who has the "look" and is very Godly {like a few girls i know from college, Ali, Emily,,etc..} , but it is sad when someone who has the "look" but doesn't have the heart, yet guys go for them before they even think about going for someone who has the heart but not the "look". Yeah, it is our nature to want something beautiful and to keep it, but looks will be gone,,, because we are all going to be getting new bodies. I am the type of a girl who looks at people's heart before their looks.. maybe that is why Jolene and I are such great friends.. Her heart is more beautiful than her "looks", yet, to me to be very Beautiful.. I can't see why any guy wouldn't want to be with her... {okies, maybe some of the guys who are going for her should leave her be...}

I really am starting to think the Lord is calling me to be single. I don't want to be, but it just may be that way. And if it is, then I am ready for it. I am willing to learn things, and to pay my own bills. I was also thinking about that, what would it be like if i just moved away!?! I know my place will be clean, but will i be able to make enough for rent, for food, and for college? what about a car, and then gas?. i don't think so. But i am ready to leave this pig-pin. But there isn't a way out. O-wells. The Lord will open a way someday, just not now!!